the past is all we know. the memories are clear. wish you were here.

this tour has been incredible. 16 days left.


i started writing a friend a letter the other day and decided to type up some of the thoughts...

i get in to deep thoughts and marinate in how shitty people are and how poorly we, as humans, treat one another.

i’m not better than anyone. we all talk shit, but we think it’s horrifying when others do it and when we’re the victim of it. we write off malicious things we say because we think we’re justified, when in all actuality, we’re just as bad as everyone else… arguably worse.

it’s so hard to trust. it’s so hard to find people to believe in. no one person is really my “best friend.” there are parts of me that no one will ever know. i feel so flawed because we all hold our flaws inside. if we could quit the pretentious bullshit and be real with one another, we’d realize that we’re not alone in our flaws.

we criticize people who are openly looking for help. we write people off as weak when they’re honest. we can’t break down or feel hurt without feeling like there’s something wrong with us, so we fake realities and fake smiles so that everyone else thinks we’re happy.

but why the fuck do we care about what everyone else thinks? there are times i get so caught up in other people that i can’t find the difference between what i want and what people want for me.

when did we succumb to such warped realities and WHY? why do we really want the things we (think we) want? everything is taught but where do you draw the line on who and what influences you?

we get consumed by what our peers think and in turn, drain out morals, our personalities, and our wallets to be who others want us to be.

when did we become such monsters and when will it stop?

for the first time in my life, i’m doing exactly what i want to do. i’m not living in fear of what my family or “friends” think, because if i did, i’d never do what i want.

i’m sick of putting what other people want for me ahead of what i want for myself.

i’m on tour with 20 people. half of which who are idolized by millions of people around the world. and those people hurt and feel and live and breathe just like the rest of us. no one person should be held above anyone because when it boils down to it, we’re all the same.

when will people realize that who you are is far more important than who you know? we need to quit trying to fill the voids with unimportant bullshit.







...my soundtrack for today is the get up kids' entire discography. this band help craft me as a music lover.

i believe in the sand beneath my toes

four year strong's "explains it all" album is going to be EPIC.



i leave for tour tomorrow. it's going to be one of the longest days ever.

5:45am (EST) flight. layover in atlanta (aka hell). arrive in orange county at 11am (PST).
merch pick up. venue. counting ALL inventory. inventorying what we have for merch set up.
and then... 4pm load in... i think. and then the show. with lots of great people coming to see me.


wish me luck.

new tour dates: dredg.

hey all,
i'm hitting the road with dredg in july/august. see dates below.
give me a heads up if you're in these cities or will be at any of these dates.

July 08, 2009 - Anaheim, California - House of Blues (with RX Bandits & Good Old War)
July 09, 2009 - San Diego, California - Soma (with RX Bandits & Good Old War)
July 10, 2009 - Tempe, Arizona - Marquee Theatre (with RX Bandits & Good Old War)
July 11, 2009 - Tuscon, Arizona - Club Congress (with RX Bandits & Good Old War)
July 12, 2009 - Tuscon, Arizona - Club Congress (with RX Bandits & Good Old War)
July 14, 2009 - Dallas, Texas - Granada Theatre (with RX Bandits & Good Old War)
July 15, 2009 - Austin, Texas - Emo's (with RX Bandits & Good Old War)
July 16, 2009 - San Antonio, Texas - White Rabbit (with RX Bandits & Zechs Marquis)
July 18, 2009 - New Orleans, Louisiana - House of Blues (with RX Bandits & Zechs Marquis)
July 20, 2009 - Orlando, Florida - Club Firestone (with RX Bandits & Zechs Marquis)
July 22, 2009 - Ft. Lauderdale, Florida - The Culture Room (with RX Bandits & Zechs Marquis)
July 23, 2009 - Jacksonville, Florida - Fire Bird (with RX Bandits & Zechs Marquis)
July 24, 2009 - St. Petersburg, Florida - Jannus Landing (with RX Bandits & Zechs Marquis)
July 25, 2009 - Atlanta, Georgia - Masquerade (with RX Bandits & Zechs Marquis)
July 26, 2009 - Carrboro, North Carolina - Cat's Cradle (with RX Bandits & Zechs Marquis)
July 28, 2009 - Towson, Maryland - Recher Theater (with RX Bandits & Zechs Marquis)
July 29, 2009 - Philadelphia, Pennsylvania - Theater of Living Arts (with RX Bandits & Zechs Marquis)
July 30, 2009 - New York, New York - FIllmore at Irving Plaza (with RX Bandits & Zechs Marquis)
July 31, 2009 - New York, New York - Bowery Ballroom (with RX Bandits & Zechs Marquis)
August 01, 2009 - Boston, Massachusetts - Paradise Rock Club (with RX Bandits & As Tall As Lions)
August 02, 2009 - Montreal, Quebec - Foufoune Electriques (with RX Bandits & As Tall As Lions)
August 04, 2009 - Toronto, Ontario - Opera House (with RX Bandits & As Tall As Lions)
August 05, 2009 - Detroit, Michigan - St. Andrew's Hall (with RX Bandits & As Tall As Lions)
August 06, 2009 - Chicago, Illinois - Bottom Lounge (with RX Bandits & As Tall As Lions)
August 07, 2009 - Sauget, Illinois - Pop's (with RX Bandits & As Tall As Lions)
August 08, 2009 - Des Moines, Iowa - People's Court (with RX Bandits & As Tall As Lions)
August 09, 2009 - St. Paul, Minnesota - Station 4 (with RX Bandits & As Tall As Lions)
August 11, 2009 - Englewood, Colorado - Gothic Theatre (with RX Bandits & As Tall As Lions)
August 12, 2009 - Murray, Utah - Murray Theatre (with RX Bandits & As Tall As Lions)
August 15, 2009 - Portland, Oregon - Wonder Ballroom (with RX Bandits & As Tall As Lions)
August 17, 2009 - Sacramento, California - Empire Event Center (with RX Bandits & As Tall As Lions)

keep digging.

sometimes i learn from my mistakes, sometimes i don't.
i'm not a perfect person but i'm learning and growing at a pace that suits me.



i try to be as real and honest as possible.
i'm the same with you as i am with anyone else.
if you ask me a question, i give you the honest answer or no answer at all.
i've made mistakes. my share and probably yours.
i will undoubtedly continue to repeat mistakes. and i will make new ones.
but i'm not ashamed, and i'll never regret the things i've done, because good or bad, they've made me who i am.


if i'm fine with what i've done and with who i am, then what makes anyone think they have the right to not be fine with what i've done? if you don't want to know the answers, don't ask the questions. i'm not going to bullshit you to make myself look better. i've got nothing to hide and no one to impress because i am myself and i have myself.

chances are, you have no idea who i really am. you have no clue where i came from and what i've been through. and by deduction, that means you have no right to open your mouth and speak about me or anyone else with negativity. until you, yourself, are a perfect person, you should concentrate on fixing yourself before you run around pointing out what is wrong with others.

you will never be perfect. you will always have something within you to fix. we all do and we all will. if you think there's something wrong with me, address it with me. talking to someone else about me isn't going to help me; and if you don't want me to develop in to a better person, you have no business talking about me. if you really want to talk to your friends about someone, talk to them about yourself. you might learn something.

stay awake

it's hard, especially in this industry, to find people who are true. who are honest believers in what they do and who are in things for the right reason.

i was fortunate enough to hit the road with four people that i believe in more than anything on the world. and ended up meeting 17 more people who believed in the same things and were in it for the right reasons. i'm beyond lucky to have had this experience and to have been inspired and challenged by great people, great places and great ideas.



brave citizens' music spoke to me long before i knew them personally, and now i have the privilege of not only knowing them on a personal basis, but of working with and for them and not only watching, but helping them grow. these four boys are my best friends and they are my biggest inspiration. i am constantly challenged them and it's making me a better person.


for some good tour story laughs, feel free to check out this entry from the boys' tour blog. 100% true, under exaggerated if anything. hands down one of the funniest experiences of my life.



also, tonight i got to see my friend pj bond on tour a band called let me run. these boys have so much heart in their music and performances that it is captivating. seeing/listening to PJ is always an outrageous experience and let me run was a great surprise. incredible people, incredible music, incredible night.

recommendations:
-brave citizens
-lydia
-eye alaska
-play radio play
-pj bond
-let me run


i think i'm going to start sharing this with people so that i actually update it.