the past is all we know. the memories are clear. wish you were here.

this tour has been incredible. 16 days left.


i started writing a friend a letter the other day and decided to type up some of the thoughts...

i get in to deep thoughts and marinate in how shitty people are and how poorly we, as humans, treat one another.

i’m not better than anyone. we all talk shit, but we think it’s horrifying when others do it and when we’re the victim of it. we write off malicious things we say because we think we’re justified, when in all actuality, we’re just as bad as everyone else… arguably worse.

it’s so hard to trust. it’s so hard to find people to believe in. no one person is really my “best friend.” there are parts of me that no one will ever know. i feel so flawed because we all hold our flaws inside. if we could quit the pretentious bullshit and be real with one another, we’d realize that we’re not alone in our flaws.

we criticize people who are openly looking for help. we write people off as weak when they’re honest. we can’t break down or feel hurt without feeling like there’s something wrong with us, so we fake realities and fake smiles so that everyone else thinks we’re happy.

but why the fuck do we care about what everyone else thinks? there are times i get so caught up in other people that i can’t find the difference between what i want and what people want for me.

when did we succumb to such warped realities and WHY? why do we really want the things we (think we) want? everything is taught but where do you draw the line on who and what influences you?

we get consumed by what our peers think and in turn, drain out morals, our personalities, and our wallets to be who others want us to be.

when did we become such monsters and when will it stop?

for the first time in my life, i’m doing exactly what i want to do. i’m not living in fear of what my family or “friends” think, because if i did, i’d never do what i want.

i’m sick of putting what other people want for me ahead of what i want for myself.

i’m on tour with 20 people. half of which who are idolized by millions of people around the world. and those people hurt and feel and live and breathe just like the rest of us. no one person should be held above anyone because when it boils down to it, we’re all the same.

when will people realize that who you are is far more important than who you know? we need to quit trying to fill the voids with unimportant bullshit.







...my soundtrack for today is the get up kids' entire discography. this band help craft me as a music lover.